Vanessa Van Petten, age 20 is the creator of RadicalParenting.com and author of the new parenting book, “Do I Get My Allowance Before or After I’m Grounded?” Through her blog and books, Vanessa suggests ways parents can better connect and communicate with their kids.Â
As kids grow up their opinions, best friends and personalities change tremendously. I always recommend that parents check in with their kids with questions that not only get them thinking, but also help adults keep up with the quickly growing mini-adult in their home.
In my book, “Do I Get My Allowance Before or After I’m Grounded?” I talk about some questions to get to know your kids that are character defining questions. Here are my favorites, feel free to expand this into some great get-to-know-each-other conversations:
Â Conversation Starters to Get to Know Your Kids:
1. What is the hardest thing about your life, what do you worry about most?
2. Is there something that you wish I knew about you?
3. What are three words to describe you?
4. What do you think is the most important quality a person can have?
5. How were you different five years ago from who you are now? What do you think you will be like five years from now?
These questions are meant to not only help you get to know each other, but also help get your child thinking about their own identity. By discussing these issues with them in an open-minded fashion, they know they can come to you when they are trying to figure themselves out…and when you want to figure them out as well. If you liked these tips and are interested in learning more about the non-verbal cues of kids, tweens and teens please check out my book “Do I Get My Allowance Before or After I’m Grounded?”
Read more great conversation starters here: 20 Teen and Tween Conversation Starters.